September 21, 2014

WHEN THEY HATCH, THEY WILL ALL PRODUCE VALID FLORIDA DRIVERS' LICENSES

Surfers and early morning walkers were stunned to find thousands of 'alien eggs' on a Sydney beach this weekend.

Article-2763283-21820E8F00000578-270_634x335

Posted by Dave on September 21, 2014 at 12:07 PM
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THIS HAPPENS FAR TOO OFTEN

Ninja sister wives busted in violent Utah burglary

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson, who says "They opened for the Osmonds.")

Posted by Dave on September 21, 2014 at 12:04 PM
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YOU ARE NOW FREE TO RAMPAGE ABOUT THE CABIN

A Sydney-bound Qantas flight has been diverted because of a drunk passenger who allegedly broke through all four sets of plastic handcuffs on the flight after repeated attempts to steal whisky.

(Thanks to Janice Gelb)

Posted by Dave on September 21, 2014 at 12:00 PM
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BECAUSE THE NEXT STEP IS HEROIN

California boy gets detention for sharing school-prepared lunch with another student

(Thanks to PirateBoy)

Posted by Dave on September 21, 2014 at 11:49 AM
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GUYS IN ACTION

Man who hid fake moustache under water valve waits five months to finish terrible pun

(Thanks to Jay Brandes)

Posted by Dave on September 21, 2014 at 11:47 AM
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THERE IS NOTHING LOWER

Man gets 4-month sentence for poaching geoducks

(Thanks to Craig Roberts)

Posted by Dave on September 21, 2014 at 11:45 AM
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UNFORTUNATE STEREOTYPE REINFORCED

Police Car Slams Into NJ Dunkin' Donuts

(Thanks to Jay Brandes)

Posted by Dave on September 21, 2014 at 11:44 AM
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September 20, 2014

UNCLEAR ON THE CONCEPT

School alcohol counsellor crashed car at nearly 4 times drink-drive limit

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on September 20, 2014 at 10:33 AM
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CSI: SOUTH CAROLINA

Brothers attack each other in fight over stolen okra

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on September 20, 2014 at 10:28 AM
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GUYS IN ACTION

Tipsy Australian fights off crocodile with eye-poke

(Thanks to Craig Roberts)

Posted by Dave on September 20, 2014 at 10:27 AM
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A NATION IN SHOCK

Honey Boo Boo's Parents 'Taking Time Apart'

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson, who says, "There is nothing left to believe in.")

Posted by Dave on September 20, 2014 at 08:19 AM
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September 19, 2014

THIS BE THE 1940 CENSUS UPDATE

Arrr strict policy be preventin' us from linkin' to the 1940 Census Update.

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

Posted by Dave on September 19, 2014 at 03:26 PM
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HOISTING THE YARDARM?

What In The Heck Was This Woman Doing During A Falcons Game?

(Thanks to Allen at Division, who says "She be raising his topsail.")

Posted by Dave on September 19, 2014 at 03:22 PM
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CELEBRITY LIFE BE HARRRRD

Demi Lovato was farted on by a fan at a meet and greet.

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

Posted by Dave on September 19, 2014 at 03:16 PM
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(APPROPRIATE PIRATE EXPRESSION GOES HERE)

Bat-wielding woman in her underwear storms elementary school

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins and Rob Simbeck)

Posted by Dave on September 19, 2014 at 03:13 PM
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WHO SAYS ROMANCE BE DEAD?

Michigan couple’s threesome goes awry, results in meat-flinging choke attack

(Thanks to Mr. Jeff "Trip Advisor" Greenfield)

Posted by Dave on September 19, 2014 at 09:47 AM
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WE BE LOSING OUR FUNDAMENTAL HUMAN RIGHTS, MATEYS

Oklahoma City man arrested for washing himself with mayonnaise in public fountain

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on September 19, 2014 at 09:18 AM
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WAL MARRRRRT

Wal-Mart de Mexico SAB, the country’s biggest retailer, is being probed by local officials after shoppers complained that a store hosted a cockfight to promote a soda company.

(Thanks to Focalpoint, who says "Cleanup on aisle 9.")

Posted by Dave on September 19, 2014 at 08:35 AM
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IT BE VIRAL, MATEYS

Ahoy! It's Talk Like a Pirate Day

Get ready for Talk Like a Pirate Day.

Aargh! Free donuts at Krispy Kreme.

Get free treasure on Sept. 19 for saying 'Avast, ye mateys!'

Shiver me timbers! International Talk Like a Pirate Day is on the horizon

Talk Like a Pirate Day in NYC: Where you can celebrate

 Ahoy! Your 'Talk Like a Pirate Day' primer 

Get The Most Out Of 'Talk Like A Pirate Day' With This Guide For Landlubbers

Video: Learn how to Talk Like a Pirate

Posted by Dave on September 19, 2014 at 08:13 AM
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THESE ITEMS BE VAGUELY RELATED

Rat runs along an escalator like a treadmill in LA subway

(Thanks Steve Hooley)

Hamster Wheel Standing Desk

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(Thanks to Jon Harris)

Posted by Dave on September 19, 2014 at 12:21 AM
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