July 01, 2016

FLORIDA WILDLIFE UPDATE

Fence-climbing alligator caught on camera at Florida country club

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on July 1, 2016 at 11:27 AM
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NOT WEIRD AT ALL!

It was my dream job, because I had access to all the snakes I wanted. I started taking venomous snakes home, so I could inject their venom, which my boss didn’t mind.

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on July 1, 2016 at 11:24 AM
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WE WERE GETTING TIRED ANYWAY

Women will have more sex with robots than men by 2025

(Thanks to Kevin Smith)

Autoplay.

Posted by Dave on July 1, 2016 at 11:08 AM
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WE BET SHE SOUNDS AS GOOD AS SHE LOOKS

Cara Delevingne's girlfriend St Vincent gives revellers something to LOO-k at as she rocks out onstage dressed as a TOILET at NYC show

(Thanks to Peter)

Posted by Dave on July 1, 2016 at 10:58 AM
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NATURE'S HUGH HEFNERS

Scorpion architects build lairs with porches and mating rooms

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on July 1, 2016 at 10:55 AM
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TOTALLY JUSTIFIED

Man punches another for refusing ramen noodles

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins and Kevin Smith)

Posted by Dave on July 1, 2016 at 10:53 AM
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CSI: AMSTERDAM

Police in the Dutch capital said they kicked down the door to an apartment to rescue a woman who turned out to be an inflatable sex doll.

(Thanks to Jon Harris)

Posted by Dave on July 1, 2016 at 10:52 AM
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BOLO

Trailer full of 20,000 pounds of cheese stolen in Wisconsin

(Thanks to Jon Harris, who says "be alert for people making large cracker purchases.")

Posted by Dave on July 1, 2016 at 10:49 AM
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June 30, 2016

GUYS IN ACTION

Man Swims In 1,500-Gallon Pool Filled With Coca-Cola And Mentos

(Thanks to John Mayson)

Posted by Dave on June 30, 2016 at 02:21 PM
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'THE FIRE DEPARTMENT WAS NOT REALLY AMUSED'

Man gets stuck inside a statue of a vagina in Germany

(Thanks to Janice Gelb, who says "Tourist trap")

Update: Apparently this is old. Somebody will be fired.

Posted by Dave on June 30, 2016 at 12:13 PM
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NAME THAT STATE!

The man identified as the victim, the landlord, said Hoffman, 41, grew upset with him “because she was looking for her crack cocaine pipe and (he) did not have one,” an affidavit states.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on June 30, 2016 at 12:11 PM
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'THEY WANTED THE GREEN SALSA INSTEAD OF THE RED'

Massive brawl erupts in Mexican restaurant in Dallas after an argument over chips and salsa

(Thanks to Le Petomane, who says "The Chuck E. Cheese of the Southwest.")

Posted by Dave on June 30, 2016 at 12:02 PM
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CANADA: LAND OF EXCITEMENT

International Mud Day celebrated in Quispamsis

(Thanks to'

Doesn't "Quispamsis" sound like the name of a disease? As in "Uncle Bud up and died from the Quispamsis."

Posted by Dave on June 30, 2016 at 12:00 PM
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UPDATE

Regarding The Blog's June 25th posting Alleged Killer And Enraged Judge Go Off The Rails In Insanely Vulgar Hearing, it can now be heard in all its deranged glory. 

Yesterday on John Fugelsang's show Tell Me Everything on SiriusXM Insight, channel 121, John and his fellow comedian Adam Sank performed – without cracking up – a verbatim reenactment of the courtroom feud between Judge Durham and defendant Allen.  Due to popular begging, show producer Xorje Olivares made it available to non-subscribers.  

Not safe for work, obviously, unless you work for SiruisXM Insight or one of the more reformed convents.

Love, 

AmoebaStampede

Posted by Dave on June 30, 2016 at 11:54 AM
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WHICH CAN ALSO BE HAZARDOUS

‘Crocodile’ spotted in London Docklands turns out to be nothing but old rope

(Thanks to W. von Papineau and Ralph)

Posted by Dave on June 30, 2016 at 11:51 AM
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WE'LL TAKE CARE OF IT

Authorities have found most of the nearly 80,000 bottles of beer that were stolen from an Atlanta brewery last week, but the company says every last drop will have to be thrown away.

(Thanks to funny man)

Posted by Dave on June 30, 2016 at 11:49 AM
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HIS LAST NAME COULD BE A CLUE

Burglar coats himself in sugar

(Thanks to funny man)

Posted by Dave on June 30, 2016 at 11:47 AM
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I WANT TO BE A PART OF IT, NEW YORK, NEW YORK

Man shoves bag of feces down woman’s shorts on Upper East Side, runs away

Update: authorities have now linked the man to a second incident.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson and Michael Huber)

Posted by Dave on June 30, 2016 at 11:46 AM
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THOSE TERRORIST BASTARDS

Snail slime causes crash on Autobahn

(Thanks to Jon Harris and Rick Day)

Posted by Dave on June 30, 2016 at 11:43 AM
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TOTALLY WORTH IT

An Australian burger chain is offering a lifetime supply of its wares to anyone who formally changes their last name to "Burger."

(Thanks to Emily, Leslie and w)

Posted by Dave on June 30, 2016 at 11:42 AM
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