May 04, 2016

HE WON'T GET FAR WITHOUT KETCHUP

Store Robbed by Potato-Wielding Suspect

(Thanks to The Perts)

Posted by Dave on May 4, 2016 at 05:36 PM
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THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING

The U.S. Has a Massive Cheese Surplus

(Thanks to Chris Johnson, who says "How are we set for crackers?")

Posted by Dave on May 4, 2016 at 05:17 PM
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WE SAW THEM OPEN FOR CARP WITH HERPES

HEDGEHOG RABIES hits Russia

(Thanks to Jeffrey Brown)

Posted by Dave on May 4, 2016 at 11:37 AM
Permalink | Comments (6)

WE SAW CARP WITH HERPES OPEN FOR PHISH

Australia wants to wipe out carp with herpes

(Thanks to Horace La Badie)

Posted by Dave on May 4, 2016 at 11:09 AM
Permalink | Comments (13)

MEANWHILE IN SPORTS

British lawnmower racing season gets under way

(Thanks to Emily, Leslie and w)

Posted by Dave on May 4, 2016 at 10:42 AM
Permalink | Comments (5)

CSI: FLORIDAAAAAAA

Okahumpka man arrested after stuffing champagne bottles down his shorts

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on May 4, 2016 at 10:38 AM
Permalink | Comments (10)

BUT WE STILL KNOW WHO WAS REALLY BEHIND IT

CERN CONFIRMS: LARGE HADRON COLLIDER DOWNED BY SMALL BEECH MARTEN

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on May 4, 2016 at 10:35 AM
Permalink | Comments (6)

SMOOTH

Guy Crashes McLaren 650S Into A Tree Ten Minutes After Buying It

(Thanks to Rick Day)

Posted by Dave on May 4, 2016 at 10:32 AM
Permalink | Comments (11)

HONEY, SOMEONE'S AT THE DOOR

"Candygram."

(Thanks to David Roe, Peter, Madeleine, Patty V., Bill H., and Charles C.

Posted by judi on May 4, 2016 at 09:08 AM
Permalink | Comments (8)

WHEN THE BLOG'S AWAY...

IMG_4396
(your caption here)

Posted by judi on May 4, 2016 at 08:31 AM
Permalink | Comments (10)

May 03, 2016

BOOK TOUR UPDATE

Almaden Country School in San Jose goes ALL OUT for visiting authors.

20160503_122335.jpg

Posted by MiamiHerald on May 3, 2016 at 04:01 PM
Permalink | Comments (20)

'THEY HAVE NO INTERNET'

Villagers Thought An Angel Had Fallen From The Sky, But It Turned Out To Be A Sex Doll

(Thanks to W. von Papineau and Charles Cates)

Posted by Dave on May 3, 2016 at 02:24 PM
Permalink | Comments (14)

WHOA

Jet-Powered Hoverboard Sets New World Record

(Thanks to The Perts)

Posted by Dave on May 3, 2016 at 11:17 AM
Permalink | Comments (9)

IT WAS RELEASED AFTER PRODUCING A VALID FLORIDA LICENSE

Wisconsin Fishing Buds Reel in 60-Year-Old 6-Pack of Beer

(Thanks to Mike Ester)

Posted by Dave on May 3, 2016 at 11:14 AM
Permalink | Comments (14)

SOUNDS SCIENTIFIC

Celebrity massage therapist reveals how she BITES her A-list clients on their backs in a bizarre technique designed to 'tenderise' muscles

(Thanks to Allen at Division)

Posted by Dave on May 3, 2016 at 11:10 AM
Permalink | Comments (19)

TIME TO SWITCH TO BEER

Toxic blob from 1970s may be nearing Cleveland water plant on Lake Erie

(Thanks to Harry Farkas, who says he saw them open for Poison)

Posted by Dave on May 3, 2016 at 11:08 AM
Permalink | Comments (12)

TRADITION

An Arizona student who showed his penis in his football team's photograph was arrested briefly after his high school unwittingly sent the image to hundreds of his Phoenix-area classmates as part of its yearbook, officials said on Monday.

(Thanks to Jon Harris and The Perts)

Posted by Dave on May 3, 2016 at 11:02 AM
Permalink | Comments (16)

May 02, 2016

'ONE STUDENT SAID THAT THE ONLY WORD MOYER KNOWS IS BONJOUR'

High school French teacher doesn't speak French, say his students

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on May 2, 2016 at 12:02 PM
Permalink | Comments (25)

OTHER THAN THAT, IT WENT SMOOTHLY

Patient catches on FIRE while undergoing surgery at a New York hospital

(Thanks to Patty Villanova)

If only somebody had written a column warning of this danger.

Posted by Dave on May 2, 2016 at 12:00 PM
Permalink | Comments (13)

CSI: RIVER FALLS

Asked if he was he going the wrong way on the highway, the driver allegedly said, 'Yeah, that was probably me.'

BONUS: The cruiser had to be professionally cleaned for spit, snot and mucus stains, plus a very bad fecal odor.

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

Posted by Dave on May 2, 2016 at 11:56 AM
Permalink | Comments (6)

 
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